What do we really know about this thing we call self confidence? Well, by slowly ripping apart this… phrase, we can figure it out. Self, you. Confidence, not being scared to do things. So obviously, self confidence means not you not being scared to do things. 

Lots of people have self confidence, but most people don’t and some of the ones that do are just stupid about it and waste it in “Art” or “Entertainment”. THE ONLY ART AND ENTERTAINMENT I NEED IS THE ART OF WAR, which was painted by Sun Tzu, AND THE ENTERTAINMENT OF FIGHTING, also created by Sun Tzu. If we were meant to use anything else for art, then obviously it would not be called ART OF WAR. 

In conclusion, you are going to screw up and there is nothing you can do to stop it. But hopefully you have the SELF CONFIDENCE, to keep trying, and if you try forever, you will win. 

That said, if you feel you don’t have confidence, or you were born with little wrists or weak knees or flimsy necks, then go look a man in the eye when you kill him and see if that doesn’t put an end to your little sissy whining. DISMISSED.

“tsk. If you were dead in spirit you wouldn’t be here”

True… True. Or one of those mamby pamby SPIES. HA.

“Uh. Sure. And you’re dead?… Welcome to the club of dead soldiers.”

ONLY IN BODY, NEVER IN SPIRIT. 

“what are you on?”

I’m on American soil, that’s what. The free-est of all soil.

Death is a state of mind, and of the states, it has the lowest taxes. Am I dead? NO, I AM NOT. Fooled you, didn’t I? By simply believing something else, you can be not dead. Hell, I must have knocked off that old tooth fairy’s block NINE times before she finally got me with her scythe, and not even that can stop the fighting spirit of a true patriot.

Hyeheheheh… Nothing can stop him. 

spy-bot:

Thank you for your sharing of knowledge. ‘America’ folder has been updated, Wednesday, September 19th, 1512 hours.

Correction; I am not your female sibling.

Can it, can. YOU AREN’T GETTING ANYTHING OUT OF ME WHICH IS GOING TO BE USED FOR YOUR INFLATION OF HUMAN MARKETS. 

spy-bot:

Pardon, it is from my original programming. I do not wish to assume your occupation.

Inquiry; what is America.

…What is…

…

America… Is everything. It’s what we fight for, it’s why we bleed, it’s freedom! It’s liberty! It’s life, existence, science, magic, weapons, taxes, everything! But you don’t understand, because you’re just a hunk of scrap. It’s my primary programming, got it? It’s all of our primary program…ming, so we can keep self preserving and killing people. It’s the land I love. And sister, it’s worth a lot more than all the gravel in the world.

spy-bot:

 I have no knowledge of such a battle taking place, jay-soo-desol.

I was manufactured and now I am here. That is all.

Well, you sure as hell aren’t AMERICAN made, so I want- AND YOU WERE JUST SPEAKING IN TONGUES LIKE THOSE OTHER CROUTONS. 

You can’t have my job. YOU CAN’T HAVE ANY OF OUR JOBS, THESE ARE AMERICAN JOBS, FOR AMERICANS. AND ALSO THOSE OTHER GUYS ESPECIALLY SPY. 

spy-bot:

explosiveliberty:

Are you backsassing me, Merlin? You just head on back to robot FRANCELAND through whatever hell-portal you came.

I was not manufactured in France.

Inquiry; who is Merlin?

Do you not even know your basic history? Merlin created you abominations then went on to fight Gen. Arthur where he died after the General gutted him with a bayonet from a lake.

…Not French, huh? Then where the hell are you from, cogface?

spy-bot:

explosiveliberty:

NO METAL MEN IN MY COUNTRY UNLESS YOU ARE SAVING THE FUTURE, CROUTON.

I am unaware of the future.

Inquiry; what country is this.

Are you backsassing me, Merlin? You just head on back to robot FRANCELAND through whatever hell-portal you came.